I’ve not been posting much this week as it’s been quite busy for me. I’ve been acting in my boss’s job for this week and will be for the next couple of months. Part of acting in a manager type role is attending meetings and I’ve sure been doing that this week while trying to get my head around doing a different role.
I’ve also had to do my job this week until my replacement starts next week. In addition to that I’ve had one and a half days of workshops and I only work four days a week. Fortunately there’s been no big crises so I’ve been able to manage.
I’m also going away to the riverland this weekend for a wedding. My sister was going to come over and stay with JJ but we decided it would be easier on her (and I thought on my house) if I took JJ over there. So tomorrow I’m going to a birthday party in the morning, then doubling back to do a two hour drive to my sister’s and a two hour drive back here. I plan on getting an early night tonight.
The reason I’m dropping JJ off at my sister’s is that I’m going to a wedding in the riverland on Saturday evening and it’s a kid-free zone. I can’t wait.
And if you’ve read this far you deserve some gossip. I went out on a date last night. We met on one of those internet sites. He’s a bit older than I would normally go for but he doesn’t look it. We met at a pub in town and had a couple of drinks. The conversation flowed pretty well. He texted me today and said he enjoyed our chat last night and he’d like to see me next week. After some more texting we’ve arranged to meet for dinner next week.
I feel a bit ambivalent at this stage. He’s nice enough but I didn’t feel a ‘spark’ with him. Should I feel a spark, or is it something that can develop? In analysing my past relationships and crushes, when I’ve felt that spark it’s quite often developed into nothing except heartbreak on my part. So this time I’m going to persist as long as it feels right and just see what happens.
Re the spark – I think if you are a bit older – talking about 30+, I think we should be a bit more realistic and have a bit more control over hormones. I would have gone for lunch before getting to the dinner date. Saturday/Sunday lunches can be more leisurely and allow for more talking, for walking, for shared activities: in short, more getting to know you without getting to intimacy settings. Particularly with someone you have met over the net – without, I presume, seeing him in his own milieu – I think you should be looking for friendship ahead of sparks. If you can’t find something to build a friendship on in conversation and shared activities, there is buckley’s of there ever being a spark no matter how long it takes. I think the old When Harry met Sally syndrome should be remembered. Men don’t necessarily do friendships without sex very well. I think friendship which can build and become intimacy but not too quickly should be the goal – but whether he can agree with this is another thing. He might be wanting to get from A-Z quickly.
I agree with you Jen. I’ve always been a big fan of “sparks.” But I have to be honest with you Jen…they’re over-rated. Sometimes you pass up a perfectly wonderful person in the process. Check it our further.
Hey Jen, stop by my place and see a couple of pictures of Bastian. They went home today.