Application schmapplication. Ain’t nobody got time for that!

I want to look back at this time and say to myself, ‘see, it was all worth it.’ Why you ask? Because I’m helping my gorgeous (said with tongue firmly in cheek at this time) son to write an application for a high school he wants to go to and which would suit him.

Applicants have to write or prepare their own application answering selection criteria. Get your parents to help you it says! Faaarrrk. I’d rather write yet another job application and that’s saying something. Although things are looking good on the job front for me. More to come when I can say more!

Ever tried helping your child write an application when their attention span is bloody nought? Sure, he wrote down the bullet points that he wanted to address, but the devil’s in the detail isn’t it? I think we’ve finally done it though and it just needs a few other people to look at it because I’ve sure had enough.

And it’s not just that. Because he doesn’t want to go to his zoned high school there’s paperwork around that justifying the decision too.

It’s Easter long weekend for goodness sake and there’s lots I’d rather be doing than pinning the lad down to concentrate. He doesn’t get the consequences of this I don’t think. Sure he’s passionate about why he wants to go this high school but translating that to an application? Nah huh!

As this woman says: “Ain’t Nobody Got Time For That“. Have you seen it?

Phoenix is settling in

Sphinx

Our dog has truly made himself a part of our family. My son describes him as mischievous and that’s a pretty good word.

When we first got him he was really well behaved and I thought he was too good to be true for a one year old dog. But he obviously feels more comfortable with us so his true nature is gradually being revealed.

I was on the phone to mum one day, sitting out in the back room. Phoenix had been into JJ’s room and was sneaking one of his soft toys outside. He knew he shouldn’t be doing it by the look he gave me as he slinked past.

He’s also started taking dirty socks and JJ’s shoes to his bed, or outside where he can lick and sniff them. While he doesn’t actually chew the shoe he will get the insert out and chew on that so now JJ has to put his shoes away. Clean clothes hanging on the clothes drier are okay, it’s just the dirty clothes he likes.

We never used to let Monty on our beds, but somehow Phoenix accompanies JJ when he’s going to sleep and I get him out when I go to bed. No doubt one night I’ll forget and wake up to someone creeping around in the hallway, and freak out until I realise it’s the dog.

JJ likes me to give him a tickle and whenever we’re mucking around on the lounge room floor there’s inevitably a dog trying to muscle his way in to the fray as well. We’ve nicknamed him the attention seeker because when he does that I start patting him and am therefore distracted from the tickling my son duties.

We took him to the beach a few weeks ago and he had a great time biting the waves and running up and down the beach. He even came in the water because we were all in there. He had that wild look in his eyes like Monty used to get when she was swimming. I think it’s because he wasn’t too comfortable being out there but it was better than being left out. I’ve still got a scar from where Monty’s claws got too close to my hand so I avoided his mad paddling front legs.

He still gets car sick which is frustrating for us, and no doubt for him. I’ve tried the expensive tablets the vet prescribed and have am now trying ginger tablets as a cheaper alternative. I need to give one to him more than half an hour out from a car ride because the last time we tried that we’d nearly arrived at our destination and he started doing the madly licking his lips thing that he does before he’s about to be sick. Luckily I was able to pull over and get him out the car before he threw up. His ginger tablet and the piece of salami I’d wrapped it in was still evident which is how I know that half an hour isn’t long enough to digest something.

On the way home that night he was fine so I wonder if night time car rides are fine and day time ones are the ones that make him sick. I hope this is something he gets over. We can’t always go somewhere when it’s dark.

But we put up with this because we love him and couldn’t imagine our lives without him now.

Womad’s in the house

Welcome to Womad

Going to Womadelaide this weekend was the perfect antidote to a bloody busy and stressful week.

A few weeks ago I happened upon a house I liked, went to see it, made an offer and the offer was rejected. I looked back at that house and missed it even though I’d only visited it once. I didn’t dwell on it heaps but just over a week ago the real estate agent contacted me to ask if I was still interested.

I was, so I went back to have another look. I took a friend and she and I both noticed a few things that would need fixing.

I stayed with my offer and a few days later it was accepted.

I contacted a building inspector who I’ve used before who just happened to have already inspected that house so he briefly told me his findings and when my offer was accepted sent me the report. As he didn’t have to physically do another inspection I got a cheaper rate for his report.

After evaluating the report, speaking to him, speaking to others, I pulled out of contract during the cooling off. Besides what needed fixing in the house I would have had to rent it out for up to a year while my house is sorted out. There’s some council stuff happening at my house which could affect me, and affect a sale until I know one way or the other.

While all this was going on I had a job interview to prepare for, and my son to get ready for a scout camp this weekend. So by Friday night I was physically and emotionally exhausted.

 

Flags

 

I always love the atmosphere at Womad and it didn’t disappoint. It’s a well-oiled machine – the organisation of it all.

I had a massage not long after I got there and that helped set the tone for the rest of the day for me. It was a bit warm but there’s plenty of shade and free sunscreen near the first-aid tent if you forgot to put sunscreen on your feet like I did.

 

Sunday evening parade at Womadelaide

Sunday night is parade night and it’s a sight and sound spectacular.

Stage 1 Womadelaide

There were definitely some music highlights too. We left there 12 hours after arrival feeling very satisfied.

Fairy story? Not likely.

Holding a butterfly

I grew up on a diet of fairy stories. The ugly duckling grows into a beautiful swan and her life is transformed. The orphaned step-sister gets to frock up for the night to go to a great party, meets a handsome prince and they end up getting married. A princess is outcast by her wicked stepmother, is poisoned and falls into a deep sleep but a handsome prince wakes her up and they live happily ever after.

Is it any wonder that I expected to meet my handsome prince and fall madly and deeply in love, with it being reciprocated, and we live happily ever after? Of course that hasn’t happened.

I got pregnant 13 years ago and the father is nowhere to be seen. I struggle along as a sole parent then I meet a bloke who I fall for. He does the fade, comes back into my life we go out for two years. We break up. He comes crawling back and I take him back – falling for the smooth words and the promises of change. Falling for the promise of what could be.

It’s pretty good to start with. However, it’s not the fairy tale relationship. He says he loves me but somehow it’s not quite enough. There’s something missing. I bring up the thought of a family holiday – his and my kids and us. He neatly avoids this commitment so I organise a holiday with JJ to go on by ourselves and keep mentioning that he could join us. Still no commitment. Then he goes and organises an overseas surfing trip with some mates. Right!!! I brush that off with the thought that he’s entitled to do that and next time it will be us.

I think about organising some time off over christmas and new year during the summer school holidays and ask if he’s taking any time off. He says that he’s not thinking about it. Then just as I go back to work after three weeks off he tells me that he’s got the next two weeks off. So that was a sudden thing was it?

We live in our separate houses half an hour apart which means that we really only see each other on weekends. He might come over one night during the week when he hasn’t got his kids but it depends on what he’s organised for his dog so often that won’t happen because he doesn’t want to leave his dog in my backyard unsupervised for the day.

So that leaves weekends. But JJ has Scouts on Friday nights during school term so when he’s got his kids that cuts out Friday nights unless they come here and that happens very rarely. Saturday night is the night then. He either comes here or we go there and spend the night. Sometimes we’ve got a party or an event on so depending on where that is, depends on where we stay for the night.

Then it’s Sunday and back to the working week and we don’t see each other during the week, especially now that I don’t work near him anymore.

I bring up the ‘where do you see our relationship going’ conversation. ‘Do you see us living together?’ He mumbles something about JJ and high school locations and obviously doesn’t really want the conversation to continue. He then mumbles something about he’s tried to go down the living together path with previous relationships and it’s gone pear-shaped.  I try to keep the ‘talk’ going but give up because conversations need two people. Especially a conversation about a relationship. I already know that he’s not considering marriage because my sister has asked him about it – with nothing to do with me. That was awkward.

The conversation winds up and he acts as though nothing has happened and it’s not mentioned for the next two weeks until I bring it up again. This time we’re not interrupted but there’s still no reassurance for me. I know deep down that if I were in a healthy relationship I wouldn’t need the reassurance I’m seeking.

We could carry on with just seeing each other maybe once a week. We could carry on like this for the next five years when our kids are out of high school. Is it magically going to change then? No, probably not. I can’t shake off the doubt. I know what I need to do.

So I think about it all for the next week or so. I give it a fair shot. After all we’ve been going out for nearly four years, but I decide to break it off. I tell him that I can’t continue like this. Ok, he says. He agrees with what I’m saying. He doesn’t come out and say that he’s madly in love with me. I actually wasn’t really expecting him to. His response just confirms things for me.

Five minutes later he picks up his stuff, gets his dog, we give each other a hug, then he’s gone without a backward glance.

I walk back into the house and inwardly pat myself on the back knowing that I’ve done the right thing.

So today is Valentine’s Day and I’m not celebrating it with my lover but I’ve got other plans which I’m looking forward to.

Everything’s a blur without my glasses

Hard work without my glasses. Day 324/365.

There’s an episode of Modern Family where both Gloria’s eyesight, and Jay’s hearing is getting worse. FYI, incase you don’t watch the show, Jay and Gloria are married. He’s considerably older than his younger, very hot wife.

Both of them are in denial about their problems and in typical sit-com fashion when things finally get resolved, and Gloria’s wearing her glasses, she looks at Jay and realises that he does indeed look a lot older than she thought.

I too have to wear glasses for reading. In fact everything’s now a blur when I don’t wear them. However, when I looki in the bathroom mirror I think I’m doing all right for my age. Sure, there are some wrinkles and lines there but it’s not too bad. That is, until I put my glasses on and I can see everything in clear focus and realise there are quite a few more wrinkles and lines than I originally thought.

Pity I can’t keep my glasses on when I pluck my eyebrows. I can’t see what I’m supposed to be plucking when I don’t have my glasses on but can’t pluck with the glasses on. I’m sure I could employ some sort of magnifying glass but don’t know that I’m ready for that because of the other hair on my face that will show up if I stray from the eyebrow area. I had my glasses on the other day when I went to the loo at work and took a peek at myself after washing my hands. As soon as I got home that evening I madly plucked my eyebrows. Maybe I should start getting someone to do it for me? Hmmm, wonder if the lad would be up for it?

I’ve become a woman from a Grumpy Old Women episode where they discuss their diminishing eyesight. One woman says she has multiple glasses scattered around her home but can she find them when she needs them? No, of course not.

I have three pairs of glasses I use constantly. One pair in my bedroom, one pair near the computer and one pair in my handbag for work and to read the small labels on packets of food at the supermarket. I have a fourth pair just in case thanks to the buy two get one free thing some optometrists have.

I have to remember to take glasses out with me if I use a different handbag so I can read menus or whatever else requires it. One day I got to work and didn’t have any glasses with me. Luckily I was able to duck out to a chemist to buy some of those magnifying spectacles. They gave me a bit of a headache but at least I could read.

Big fonts are my friend. Small fonts are the bane of my life. I’ve mentioned the tiny print on many labels. Small website fonts are another annoyance. Luckily, many recent website updates have embraced larger font sizes. And I know I can increase the font size myself if I want – and I do that a lot. Ctrl+ for Windows or Cmd+ for a Mac are my keyboard go tos to increase font sizes.

Even looking at my jewellery – particularly earrings – I sometimes have to put my glasses on so I can see exactly what I’ve got.

I find that wearing my glasses when preparing food is pretty much a given now and I’m guessing that in the not too distant future I may have to embrace the bi-focals, although my long distance vision is still good.

I wonder if I’ll ever lose that frustration that I get when I try to read something without glasses and realise that no matter how far away from my eyes I put it, it will never be in focus?

What about you? Do you have to wear glasses for reading?

I had a dream

Little balls to orange flowers

Last night I had a dream that had two people in it I haven’t seen for a few years.

They both live overseas now which is one reason I haven’t seen them. The other reason for one of the people in the dream is that we had a falling out. Only I don’t know what the falling out was over.

We met nearly 20 years ago through an ex of mine and got on really well.

A few years later she moved to England to study and I met up with her in the year 2000 in London. It was indirectly through her that I met my son’s father. She’d met a guy at a party and my son’s father was his friend. It’s a pity we don’t talk any more because I would love for her to tell my son another perspective on the father he’s never met.

She got back to Australia two days before I did and moved into my house until she got herself settled back in. She was great in helping me get through the second month or so of my pregnancy by walking my dog for me and cooking some meals for me. I had no energy to do anything apart from go to work and at that stage I’d told nobody at work.

She was around for the first six months of JJ’s life and if I’d had a christening for him I’d earmarked her to be a godmother.

Then she moved overseas to work when the only contact was email and phone and that was semi-regular.

I think I know why she may have stopped contacting me. It was something I said to her that I think was a valid point but I really should have kept my trap shut.

Anyway, unless I ask her, I’ll never know for sure.

I do think about her sometimes and it was bizarre that she was in a dream last night as if nothing had happened.

 

My dreams. What are they?

Sun going down

I’ve managed to stay away from this blog for the whole of this year thus far. That hasn’t been hard.

At the end of last year I was sick of reading 2013 recap posts so I purposely didn’t do one of my own. I’m not a Christmas fan so didn’t want to write about that either.

At the beginning of this year I was sick of reading welcome to 2014 posts so I didn’t do one of my own. It’s because I’m bolshy but that doesn’t help a girl maintain a blog that she really wants to keep doing.

Plus I was on holidays and it became a holiday away from digital as well. That was bloody brilliant. There was some work that I’d lined up over my break but it’s been delayed and I was happy about that. I really needed to be away from thinking and I was enjoying our staycation. My unplanned digital break kept me away from my more ‘professional blog’ too – Content is. I have some posts in draft there so I’ll get back to that.

It’s also because I don’t know what the hell I want to do this year. A friend asked me what my dreams are and I didn’t know off the top of my head. That’s a bit sad isn’t it?

Sure there’s things I want to do. I want to go to Switzerland to visit my friends and see and stay in their re-modelled Swiss chalet. I should just book flights and just have the date of travel and organise things from there. Afterall that’s how I did my backpacking overseas trip all those years ago. This is the year I should do it. It’s my son’s last year of primary school and I’d rather him miss some of that than high school. But then the adult voice in my head tells me, ‘you don’t even know if you have a job past the end of February yet girl. How are you gonna pay for this trip?’

I’d like to do up my very outdated kitchen and bathroom but due to not knowing where to start, I never start anything. There’s also other things holding me back on this one like the local council wanting to buy a chunk of my backyard to widen the nearby laneway. If I go ahead with the land sale then I’ll have money to update the kitchen and bathroom. Still don’t know where to start with an expensive exercise updating these two rooms would entail.

I’m glad I started writing this. It’s one of the real benefits of blogging/writing for me – getting my thoughts out there. Damnit, there are things I want to do.

I’m having some girlfriends over on Saturday night to workshop an idea they’ve had about an acapella choir. The world is screaming out for this type of choir I think. Well, in my dreams it is. We’ll be shit-hot. Just gotta get it off the ground, but that’s the type of thing I do. Get ideas off the ground.

I’ve joined a photography meetup group in Adelaide to get my off my arse and take more photos. Since I stopped the photo a day at the end of 2012 I do miss it but haven’t found another photography groove yet. I am lusting after a new compact camera though, the Sony RX100, as talked about on Petapixel recently. Perhaps when I sort out my work situation for after the end of Feb, I’ll be able to justify buying one.

This isn’t a dream, but a must-do. As mentioned above it’s JJ’s last year in primary school. I’d like him to go to a decent state high school and there are some good high schools in our area except the one we’re zoned for which means he has to apply. This will mean a busy few months checking things out and writing applications. Fingers crossed for him.

So, I’ve done what I said I wasn’t going to do. I’ve written a ‘what I hope 2014 is for me’ post. Oh well. Bandwagon – I’ve jumped on you.